Carnival Personnel

Sideshow #64 De-Comp Waits For No One

This week’s sideshow Biff and Jacques’ guest Matt, has a dead-end job.   Yet, there is a lot of stiff competition at his work.  You know how sometimes living people become not living people … since his early teens, Matt’s worked in the LEGAL (important to point that out) body removal business.  Working at the funeral home his grand-dad started, Matt is the funniest guy to drive a hearse since Michael Keaton in Nightshift.  Matt also rocks the mic as a college sports PA announcer and can’t wait to get up on stage doing stand-up post covid.  So, stretch out on the embalming table and listen to talk about how stacking caskets is a high stakes game of Jenga!

 

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Biff on Twitter is @BiffPlaysHockey

Jacques on Twitter is @TheJacques4

 

Opening Song: God’s Song (That’s Why I Love Man Kind) Randy Newman

Closing Song: Warm Line by Dan Cray

Where's My Potato's Penis?

Jacques finally pays for a live-stream (Patton Oswald) worth the money!

Boys chat it’s GREAT to see FNH pal JT on MSNBC but sadly because he’s representing the family of a guy shot by cops for being black while holding an Ice Tea. Fiercely independent, totally unregulated Texas needs AOC and Beta to put on capes and play superhero, Biff talks bukkake (no really, he does) and from the CP Vault (Ep. 130 2/24/20) Joe’s Self-Indulgent Theater - Emo Phillip’s sings Fresh Prince Of Bel-Air theme. Jacques watching HBO Max’ Lady and the Dale, Netflix’ Nick Cage’s History Of Swear Words and 1967 Cring-tastic Aquaman cartoon as Biff is watching episodes of The Match Game with Betty White from 1974 (good call Biff!).  Jacques reveals new weight lost program for himself … put on Oculus headset and get lost in world pretending you're a Jedi and emerge 3 dehydrated days later 20 lbs lighter. Willie O’Ree skates chat in sport, parenting tips and much mush more.  Well more … not really much much more.

 

CP: Twitter: https://twitter.com/carnivalpodcast

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Biff on Twitter is @BiffPlaysHockey

Jacques on Twitter is @TheJacques4

 

Opening Song: Gomer by Beyond Id

Closing Song: My Bro Zeb’s Cover of Beyond Id’s “It’s Only Life”

Sideshow # 63 My BESH Friend Pt. 1 of Many

Video game developer, entrepreneur and overall really nice guy BESH zooms in to drop some knowledge on Biff and Jacques.  BESH talks about coding his own DOOM levels on his dads old IBM computer in Jr. High, to the process of putting an entire team of professionals together to produce games, get them to market and make a living.  BESH lays out some of the pros and cons of working for a AAA development giants vs being your own boss and controlling your successful career and factoring in a healthy life balance.  BESH is ppprrreeetttttyyyyy sure this whole video game “thing” isn’t a fade and will only be growing … we’ll see. Truly CP is hoping BESH will come back MANY times as there is just no way to cover this field in one chat.

 

Opening Music: Blanco OST by Model CHP3Y

Closing Music: Glass Heart By Model CHP3Y

 

More amazing music BY Model CHP3Y

Twitter: https://twitter.com/Model_CHP3Y

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/ModelCHP3Y

 

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Biff on Twitter is @BiffPlaysHockey

Jacques on Twitter is @TheJacques4

Ep. # 168 I'm Not A Cat

Valentine Day tips from CP? No, not really.  FINALLY, Harriet Tubman is going on the $20 bill!!  Long over due!  Big shout out to a real-life hero Hayden. Larry Flint’s health takes a turn for the worst.  Biden keeps acting like a President as Florida Man’s 2^nd Impeachment trial rolls on.  Gina Carano goes out of her way to get fired by Disney (finally).  Biff brings us “This Week In Japanese Crime” and teaches us this week’s phrase “今朝毎朝” (This Morning, Every Morning: Keh-Sha My-ess-ah) From the CP vault, Joe’s Self Indulgent Theater – Tommy Boy’s Rant (From Ep. 120 Nov. 11, 19). Brady still great, WNHL cancels season. Biff gives a thumbs up to Demon Slayer on Netflix, Jacques a thumbs up to The Boys on Amazon Prime.

 

CP: Twitter: https://twitter.com/carnivalpodcast

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/carnivalpodcast/

 

Biff on Twitter is @BiffPlaysHockey

Jacques on Twitter is @TheJacques4

 

Opening Song: Gomer by Beyond Id

Closing Song: Scratch Tickets by My Brother Zebulon

 

Sideshow# 62 - Dr. Ross Salawitch. He's Wicked Smaht, Kid.

Dr. Ross Salawitch is a Professor of Atmospheric Chemistry at The University Of Maryland.  He’s like our own Captain Planet.  With President Biden instantly rejoining the Paris Climate Agreement, we thought talking with Ross, whose book, “Paris Climate Agreement: Beacon Of Hope” which is a road map of how to actually achieve the goals of the agreement would be a refreshing change of pace from Jacques’ fart jokes and Biff’s wildly inaccurate NHL predictions.   Download Dr. Salawitch’s book FOR FREE from Springer.com https://link.springer.com/book/10.1007%2F978-3-319-46939-3   You can follow Dr. Salawitch on twitter: @Ross_Salawitch   Opening Song: Theme from Captain Planet Closing Song: Recess by Dan Cray and Beyond Id   CP: Twitter: https://twitter.com/carnivalpodcast   Biff on Twitter is @BiffPlaysHockey Jacques on Twitter is @TheJacques4   And don’t forget …

Episode 167 Jews In Space ... With Lasers!

The Fraternal Order of FNH steps in to help right a wrong … How do you turn away a 95-year old WW2 hero showing up to get his Covid Vaccination? Easy, asked the clowns in Glendale AZ.  Not on our watch! Jacques learns it’s GREAT to support artist you love during a pandemic maybe just read the fine print. Should we love Uber Eats and Progressive commercials THIS much? Mel Brooks gave us Jews In Space …GOP gave us Jews In Space … With Lasers!  AOC is awesome.  Biff updates us on crime wave (really?) in Japan and he breaks down his Superbowl pick.  How much do you have to dumb down GameStop stock story for Jacques to get it and his thoughts on Kong v Godzilla (of course the 1962 version!). Closing Song “It’s So Hard To Be Like Jacques” Sebadoh parody by Jacques' friends (?) My Bro Zebulon circa 1994

 

CP: Twitter: https://twitter.com/carnivalpodcast

 

Biff on Twitter is @BiffPlaysHockey

Jacques on Twitter is @TheJacques4

 

Jenny is 867-5309

Sideshow #61 - Willie O'Ree

Biff and Jacques chat the Great Willie O’Ree. The Bruins, a little late to the dance, are finally retiring Willie’s #22 he wore in 1958 when he broke the color barrier.  Biff tells of a personal interaction with Willie in Santa Monica, CA a few years back.  Biff also points out while Willie’s number being retired most likely was a positive step brought on by the BLM movement, the NHL has a long way to go to make their “Hockey Is For Everyone” program a true outreach. 

 

We highly suggest following (and donating to:)

https://blackgirlhockeyclub.org

Twitter: https://twitter.com/blackgirlshockey

 

CP: Twitter: https://twitter.com/carnivalpodcast

Episode 166 - Turning Japanese, I Really Think So!

Jacques and Joe (record scratch) … Jacques and BIFF?  After unsuccessful attempts to beg, bribe and blackmail Joe to return to CP, Jacques cons long-time friend, long time hockey team mate (and former CP guest) Biff to co-pilot.  Social media giants FINALLY do the right thing, and like ‘Merica itself, kicks Donny_2-Scoops to the curb. Bracing for Pardon-Palooza.  Going over the “other Joe’s” priorities, and Biff uses the tried and true Diane Chambers method of sports predictions to forecast 5 times this week coming up. Parenting tip from Biff and much much more … well, more. Closing song: “Ruby” by Kenny Rogers performed by Beyond Id (circa 1994?)

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Episode 165: Mission Accomplished!

Jacques and Joe finally say goodbye… to Donald Trump! They celebrate the election of Joe Biden as the next president, plot the possible courses for the incoming Biden-Harris administration, and discuss the ever-present division between Republicans and Democrats after this historic election! Also, a special show announcement at the end of this supersized episode that is sure to cause division among Carnival Personnel… fans? And THANK YOU!

Closing Song: “Other Break” by Beyond Id

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Sideshow #60: Borat

Jacques and Joe talk about both Borat movies. Very nice! Great success! My wife!

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